F.A.T. 60, DIAMOND CUTTERS 36

The baboon remains steadfastly clinging to the shoulder area of the Diamond Cutters’ back, following another loss, this time at the hands of F.A.T. The Cutters have failed to win a game this season, despite last night having a full line-up for the first time. Lack of match fitness, a virus, injury and lack of financial sponsorship were largely to blame for the loss last night, as has been the case all season.

The large contingent of Cutters fans could not break the voodoo of the cursed F.A.T. Superdome, with the Cutters off to a strong start but unable to keep up the level of intensity. The DC GM expressed his gratitude to the loyal fans, declaring "these people will be the ones most rewarded when we take home the championship at the end of the season."

The Cutters in the end went down without much of a fight, with only Ben ‘Bubba’ showing some resistance scoring the votes for the team MVP award with 11 points. He never failed to disappoint the expectant crowd with his sweet moves to the basket. ‘King Kong’ Wong was also good although his lack of game time in previous weeks was evident, scoring 8 points. Scott was solid for 7 points, ‘Half Man Half Amazing’ Yochem went for 6, Kep ‘the Squid’ 2, and Davide "Kurt Rambis’ Le Vene 2. Tim failed to score, but made up for this in his incessant rejections, with help from Scott and Wong.

In perhaps the play of the game, with the half running down and F.A.T. trying to set up a big final play, the ball got inside however was met by ‘the Long Arm of the Law’ Scott and swatted emphatically out of bounds.